When We Fall Apart

Feelin the Pain

It’s been said that tears are the language of the soul. And there’s a reason for that. When we cry, we’re releasing the negative energy and emotions that have been bottled up inside us. This can be really helpful when going through tough times.

In today’s culture, especially for men, feeling pain or expressing pain is often seen as weakness. You are told to be strong, to suck it up, and to hold it together. It’s like a recent commercial I saw where the person has expressed experiencing a mental health crisis and everyone they consult gives them all the wrong advice. It’s not that we shouldn’t be strong, but there are times when healing will only come when we are allowed to work through pain, grief, or sorrow.

The Message

I’m Ken Gober and this is “Songs That Matter.” Today’s song and message comes from singer-songwriter Ryan Stevenson entitled “When We Fall Apart.” Man there are so many great nuggets in this song that will help us when days are dark, and grief is heavy. But in the time that I have, I want to focus on the chorus of the song. The first half of the course says;

It’s ok to cry

It’s ok to fall apart

You don’t have to try

To be strong when you are not

What great lyrics and an even better message!

It’s often said that laughter is the best medicine, but in times of sorrow when it feels like our whole world is crumbling, crying can be the beginning of healing. Sometimes it’s hard to let yourself cry, especially if you’re used to being strong all the time but crying allows us to express our feelings and relieve stress.

There’s a line in the chorus that says, “you don’t have to try to be strong when you are not.” In our weakest times, I believe that’s when God shows up to shoulder our pain and grief. Paul says, that when we are weak God’s grace abounds the more and He is prevalent and much present in our sufferings. God is able to be strong for us through our weakest times and he can and will carry us through. When we are weak that’s when God becomes our strength.

The second half of the course says;

And it may take some time to make sense of all your thoughts

But don’t ever fight your tears

‘Cause there is freedom in every drop

Healing Is A Process

You see healing is a process and it takes time to sort through all those emotions and thoughts to fully understand all you’re going through. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable opens your heart to God so He has the space and capacity to provide healing and comfort, and freedom from the chains of grief and sorrow. It may never make complete sense, trust me, but God will somehow help you navigate through the confusion.

Finally, the writer sums up the meaning of all this with, in my opinion, the most powerful line in the song “Sometimes the only way to heal a broken heart is when we fall apart!” When we fall apart God’s uses those broken pieces to put us back together His way.

I can only image how the disciples felt after the death of Jesus. For three years they walked, lived, and spent every waking moment with him. And especially Peter, who must have felt at his worst after denying even knowing Jesus three times.

In Mark 14:72 (AMP) it says;

“And Peter remembered what Jesus said to him: “Before a rooster crows twice, you will deny Me three times.” And thinking of this, he began weeping [in anguish].”

Talking about falling apart, Peter felt the ultimate grief. He along with the other disciples, abandoned their friend in his most needed hour. Then to top it all off he denied even knowing him. Peter was a wreck after Jesus was crucified and I think it’s safe to say broken. But if the writer is correct, the only way to heal is being at your worst point in life, your “rock bottom.” Only then can God put the broken pieces back together His way. And as we know from the bible, Peter became a great champion for the faith.

So when sorrow comes into your life and you’re at your darkest point, remember;

It’s ok to cry

It’s ok to fall apart

You don’t have to try

To be strong when you are not

And it may take some time to make sense of all your thoughts

But don’t ever fight your tears

‘Cause there is freedom in every drop

Sometimes the only way to heal a broken heart is when we fall apart

Ken Gober

Ken Gober

Blogger and Songwriter

Welcome to a Faith Fuel Life, I’m Ken Gober and this is a space where authenticity reigns supreme and introspection takes center stage. 

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